Hey brothers and sisters,
I just had my first yoga practice in months. I've been unwilling to do much yoga during my first trimester of pregnancy. Between the crippling nausea and fatigue, I've been mostly laying down flat on my back, watching life go by. But with the increase in hormones surging through me, I've been an emotional wreck. Oh, of course I have good days, where I feel buzzy and happy and blissed out. But overall...it doesn't take much to send me into an emotional tailspin. And since I am 12 weeks pregnant right now, my child's pituitary gland is getting developed this week; and it becomes much more of a priority to keep calm and centered so that I don't release stress hormones to my baby that could alter his or her own development and own wellbeing.
SO...here we go. I am committing myself to yoga. I have to be practical about it...I am out of practice and I am still dealing with exhausting pregnancy symptoms. But at this point...the cost of NOT doing yoga and keeping myself centered and composed is simply too great. I will not thrust emotional instability onto my child, hormones or not. I KNOW that yoga is the key to keeping myself stable, calm and centered. I just know it in the fiber of my being.
Today I popped in my prenatal vinyasa yoga dvd...which I have never done before, and decided to give the 75 minute practice a trial run. The dvd has options for a 15 minute, 30 minute, 45 minute, or 75 minute practice, depending on how you feel. I specifically got this particular dvd because it got great reviews on Amazon.com, though everyone warned that the practices were HARD, difficult for regular people, let alone pregnant women. I was too ambitious for my first practice I think, and stopped the dvd after 40 minutes, totally sweating.
But here's the thing...I felt so much lighter afterward. I felt amazing. I felt calm, and like I actually did something to stabilize myself.
In the beginning, when I got on the mat and sat down, tears started flowing again. I just sorta watched the emotion...like, "oh okay...guess I got a lot of emotional energy being stored in there." And every time we sank down into the hip lunges in the practice, I could feel the tears squeezing out my eyes the same time as my hip joints were being opened and squeezed.
After the practice, instead of feeling let down and disappointed in myself that I didn't complete the entire 75 minute practice (like the old me would have felt), I simply felt calm, and reassured, and practical...realizing that for my current physical condition I would need to do the 45 minute practice this week until I am able to build up my strength to do more. I realized how powerful it is simply stepping on the mat.
I felt a lot of compassion and love for myself and my growing baby...respect for where my body is at and happy that I am able to give myself what I need. I feel optimistic and I am DEFINITELY thinking a lot clearer.
I am already looking forward to my 45 minute practice tomorrow and just wanted to share. This blog exists to allow myself and others to share our experiences with yoga, and to help motivate us to stay on track during trying times of massive growth and development.
I am very thankful for yoga. I feel like with a daily yoga practice, the future is very bright for me and my baby.
